I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
My breasts were aching with rage.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
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