My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
