She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
