Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
