I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
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