I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
