just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
