i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
youre lurking in front of me
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
