Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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