So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
worst night to have a conscience
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
