I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
