DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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