If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize