I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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