so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
whose ass print is on the piano?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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