Whod you bang
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
