You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I intend to get homeless drunk
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
