help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
