Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
