Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
