hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
