i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
