Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
