nut hugger
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
