it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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