Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Is this like a preordered booty call?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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