Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
