Little spoons don't ask big questions
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
