let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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