I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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