So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
