Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
