guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
