Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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