I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize
