i don't like sucking hair
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
