she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
