sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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