spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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