Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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