drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
