Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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