Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
