Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
