I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize