conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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