I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
