piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
