I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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