yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
