Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize